When you have kids, a divorce will never be as simple as you would like it to be, and you might constantly worry about the effect that your separation is having on your children. If you want to make sure that you are raising resilient kids who will grow up to be healthy and well-adjusted, here are some of the major steps that you can take to achieve this.
1. Get Help
Even though you might know your kids inside out, this does not mean that you are an expert on children. In many cases, you might also be too close to the situation to see how the divorce is affecting your kids, or you might be struggling to make the right decisions for them. Rather than simply try your best to care for your kids and their future, you should consider getting help. There are many services that can provide you with support and that will aid you in co-parenting to the best of your ability. For instance, Two Healthy Homes can offer you strategy sessions, advice, and counseling that can help you to give your kids the best life possible in the midst of divorce and can give you unbiased tips for you and your children’s situation.
2. Communicate With Your Kids
When you are looking to raise resilient children, it is vital that you communicate with them as much as possible and that you are transparent with them where you can be. Instead of sheltering them and trying to hide the facts from them, being honest can help them to adapt to the changes that are occurring in their life and will ensure that they are not caught out and thrown by anything that happens. This will also strengthen your relationship with them as they are less likely to feel betrayed during the course of the divorce and will be able to remain on the same page as you at all times. However, you might want to look into how to deliver news in child-friendly terms that they understand but that do not patronize them.
3. Listen to Your Kids
You should also make sure that your kids feel listened to at all times and that they have a space in which to share their emotions and work through them, whether this is through conversation with you or a professional counselor. By giving them the chance to understand their feelings and the cause of them, you will be able to prevent mental health issues from developing and ensure that these emotions are not bottled up for a long time to come.
4. Remind Them of Your Love
Sometimes, in the midst of divorce, your children might worry that your love for them has faded as your relationship has broken down, especially if there is a new partner or family involved. This means that you should constantly remind them how much you love them and try to spend time with them throughout the process of divorce to maintain your relationship.